Working Mothers: It’s Time to Start Feeling Proud, Not Guilty!

Motherhood is a journey of individual learning. Not a single woman knows beforehand how to be a mother. Our immense love, our values and beliefs guide us. We embrace motherhood as the greatest joy- as well as a huge responsibility.

Mothers have an enormous influence in the development of new generations, of future leaders. We have the power to nurture a childhood where girls and boys grow up to achieve their dreams. Let’s not forget though that we are individuals with our own dreams, passions, hopes, goals: with a mission of our own. We have the capacity to fulfill many roles, to succeed in the different facets of being a woman.

Nowadays, the number of women who continue working after having children is rising, and this trend is changing family life. Working mothers across all professional fields are reshaping maternity and paternity roles. Yet, most mothers, often feel guilty every morning when they leave for work.

Is it really possible to find balance between professional realization and raising children? The answer is yes. Reclaiming one’s right to combine maternity and a career is conceivable. The first step is to stop feeling guilty and get rid of old beliefs and harmful cultural prejudices.

As working mothers, we constantly question ourselves if we are good enough — as moms and as professionals. It is time to acknowledge that we are not bad mothers for working and we are not bad professionals because we are moms. Stop sweating over missing a meeting because your daughter is sick, or outsourcing the organization of your kid’s birthday party. Accept the trade-offs and connect with the power you have within to succeed in all the facets of being a woman.

How to overcome a working mother’s guilt? Here is a piece of advice:

1. Bonding is not about time- it is about love.It is clear that children need to build a warm, nurturing relationship with their moms, to feel safe and know they are loved unconditionally. However, giving your children this certainty does not require that you stay home 24/7.
2. Let your children learn through interaction with the world. Mothers are central in their children’s lives but babies and toddlers learn about the world and themselves, and acquire important skills through interaction with other people.
3. Aim to be present, not perfect.The quest to be a super-mom who does everything flawlessly will only wear you out. Be the best you can be, awaken in your love and share it with your children. Focus on providing significant emotional nourishment, connect with your children, and make sure to spend quality time together.
4. Speak up for your rights. Family-friendly policies within companies should not be a perk but rather a well-deserved right. A best practice is to offer flexible scheduling to the entire staff — mothers and fathers in order to level the share of responsibility. Research shows that when companies offer their workers flexible time arrangements, employees are happier, more productive, and less likely to quit.
5. Set your own rules. Forget about what other people are doing. What works for your family’s particular needs and makes you and them happy is what you should do. Don’t compare yourself to other mothers. Enjoy raising your kids, the way you consider it best.

Working mothers should feel proud, not guilty. Remember it is not perfection but dedication what makes children feel loved and protected. Enjoy all the opportunities that life gives you to become a fulfilled human being while you accompany your children in this beautiful learning journey called life.